Sorry, this is going to be a rant. Not a major rant, just a wee one, but a rant nonetheless. I am an angry Cannonball…
This past weekend, Em and I took a trip up to Bangkok because for starters it was my birthday but also because Em’s flying home to the States for a month so we figured we may as well get closer to the airport. It should have been a great weekend, all romance and saying goodbye and telling each how we’ll miss the other and all that sappy stuff. Well to be fair we did do all that, in fact we excelled at it🙂
Unfortunately the stay was marred by our choice of accommodation. Our friend Dave recommended that we check out a place called Suk 11 on Sukhumvvit Road, Soi 11 (surprisingly enough). We checked out their website and it looked fairly decent – not the cheapest out there but not the most expensive either. At the end of the day it was just somewhere to lay our heads in between bouts of sightseeing and drinking, we weren’t too bothered as long as we had our own shower and a double bed.
So we rocked up at Suk 11 about 10am after a long and relatively sleepless night on the sleeper train from Surat. We were both exhausted, sweaty and just looking to have a cool shower and a lie down before hitting the town. But then we hit reception…
“Okay, here you go.”
“No, we need both of them.”
“But the booking is just in my name.”
“Doesn’t matter, we need both, it’s the law.”
After a lot of humming and hawing we eventually capitulated – despite having secured a refund already, we were just too tired to find another place. Em searched through her bags for her one and we waited for them to get photocopied (something I hate, really don’t like the insecurity of it all). I mentioned to the owner that I live in Surat Thani and as such never carry my passport around with me when staying around Thailand.
“No, you need passports everywhere.”
“Well you don’t really, this is the first place I’ve needed it, it was blind luck I had it on me.”
“No, you need passports in every hotel in Thailand, it’s the law.”
“Actually you don’t, I’ve been living here over six months and nowhere else has required it. Sometimes they ask but I just explain I’m a teacher in Surat and they don’t mind.”
“No, every single hotel requires it, I am Thai and this is the law, I know the law of my own country.”
“Well it may be the law but not every hotel follows it so strictly. Like I say, this is the first time I’ve needed it and I’ve probably stayed in ten or twelve different places over here.”
“No, it is the law and you must respect the law, you need your passport everywhere because the police come and check.”
And so on and so forth, you get the idea. I wanted to properly rant at her, to scream that just because she set up shop next to one of the most notorious red-light areas in Bangkok doesn’t mean everywhere else in the country gets treated with the same suspicion by the cops. Or tell her that she should maybe try stepping out of Bangkok for a change to see what the rest of her country is like and how they do business. I really wanted to go to town on the “respect the law” bit, to ask her that if I go to Saudi Arabia I should respect their predilection for stoning women who have the indecency to go and get themselves raped.
Anyhoo, I took a few deep breaths, swallowed the rising bile and rage and we headed up to our room. All well and good, no more encounters till the next morning.
I was only there for the one night and Em had elected to stay on at Suk 11 for Sunnday and head to Novotel at the airport for Monday night. As such we booked a double for one night and then a single for the next. Makes sense, right? Well I checked out with no problems but then Em tried to get her room, only to be harassed by the owner again – this time accusing her of trying to let me sneak into the place and stay an extra night.
Seriously? I mean you couldn’t have paid me to stay there again. And on top of that I had a frickin’ train ticket back to Surat for that night, something I’d already mentioned to the staff as I checked out!
The final straw was the next morning when I was back in Surat. I texted Em to let her know I was home safe only to find out that the owner was in megabitch mode again. This time Em had committed the heinous crime of calling Novotel to try and arrange for one of their cars to come and pick her up. “No problem miss”, they said, “just put us on to the staff at Suk 11 and we’ll get the address details.”
“Can you please talk to the Novotel staff, they would like the details of the hostel.”
“You’re speaking English, you can do it yourself.”
“Speak to them yourself, you’re already doing it.” (Exit stage left)
(To Novotel) “The owner of Suk 11 won’t speak to you.”
“She refuses to speak to you.”
Un. Fucking. Believable.
Now this behaviour would have my hackles up at the best of times but at this point Em was tired, had just said goodbye to me for a month, was facing a 20-odd hour flight home and was alone in a strange city. Having to deal with this as well made her upset and that will not stand. THIS AGGRESSION WILL NOT STAND!!! If I ever see that lady again she’s getting punched, I don’t care that she’s a woman or that she’s old. Fuck her. Elbow to the side of the temple, knee to the ribs. How’s your attitude now?
So, if you’re ever staying in Bangkok do NOT stay at Suk 11. It’s without a doubt the worst accommodation experience I’ve ever had, all thanks to that witch. I think everywhere else I’ve stayed in Thailand has been friendly and welcoming, just as the guidebooks would have you expect. Shame the evilbitchfuckwhore of Suk 11 had to spoil that.
On the plus side I had a good birthday, got an album of bagpipe-based punk rock from Em’s dad and Em herself gave me a photo album full of shots of the two of us for while she’s away. She’s awesome. I am a sad Paul but at the same time a very, very happy Paul🙂